The 2016 Republican presidential hopefuls are coming out of the RINO woodwork today. Next up is Louisiana Governor  and Republican Governor’s Association leader Bobby Jindal who spoke to party members at the Republican National Committee’s Winter Meeting this evening. Jindal wasted no time in distancing himself from the group he considers toxic to voters:

“We must stop being the stupid party.” “We must stop looking backward.” “We must stop insulting the intelligence of voters.”

And by “we” he meant – all of you out there who aren’t hip and cool and going with the obvious flow of hipness and coolness spewing forth from the White House, like me, BOBBER Jindal. Mean, smelly old republicans, according to Jindal, are paying WAAAAY too much attention to crunching numbers and trying to hold an out of control democrat party from spending our children and grandchildren into permanent servitude. No, Jindal thinks conservatives should close the books and head on out to the GAP with the rest of the 90210 Washington crowd.

“We seem to have an obsession with government bookkeeping,” Jindal told the crowd.“We as Republicans have to accept that government number crunching – even conservative number crunching – is not the answer to our nation’s problems. ”

Jindal said that instead of being the “party of austerity,” Republicans must “boldly show what the future can look like with the free-market policies that we believe in.”

Don’t let that faintly familiar word “austerity” slip past you without understanding exactly what Jindal was referring to when he used it:

In economics, austerity refers to a policy of deficit-cutting by lowering spending via a reduction in the amount of benefits and public services provided.

So let’s rephrase Jindal’s remark this way, cutting out the fluffery and replacing it with some layman’s transparency: Instead of concerning ourselves with reducing the deficit and lowering spending, let’s just take a lesson out of the cool democrats club handbook and start being more like them; spend until we puke and have lavish all expense paid trips to Hedonism where we can bathe in tapioca pudding and have our genitals soaked in cucumber juice, all at the expense of the American taxpayer.

More of Jindal’s comments, a few of which are really out there in left field:

“We must compete for every single vote: the 47 percent and the 53 percent and any other combination of numbers that adds up to 100 percent.”
“The first step in getting the voters to like you is to demonstrate that you like them.”

Republicans “must reject the notion that demography is destiny, the pathetic and simplistic notion that skin pigmentation dictates voter behavior. We must treat all people as individuals rather than as members of special interest groups.”

Skin pigmentation, however, does dictate voter behavior in some cases. Barack Obama has enjoyed a record 93-95% African American voter turnout supporting him, much higher than any other president in history, including all previous Democrat presidents. As I wrote in reference to Colin Powell’s recent disparaging comments of his previous party and his sheltering, almost farther-like defense of President Obama, I think people do have a tendency to support people from within their own race and I think it’s an instinctual motivator, one that we are all guilty of, and I use the word guilty in a very lighthearted way. The problem with that arises when the candidate in question, be it Barack Obama as a half black man or David Duke as a full white man, are supported FOR NO OTHER REASON than their skin color while they do a disservice to our country, and are encouraged by a large chunk of voters – who care less about results than they do about what color a man’s skin is – to continue.

Obviously, my black countrymen haven’t been doing their homework and voting based on the results of that study into Obama politics because the guys a complete fiscal and foreign policy disaster. I understand their desire to see their own succeed and can empathize with that plight, but their narrow focus is resulting in a devastating end result.

Back to Jindal:

“Republicans have not only lost elections but lost issue arguments with Democrats. At present we have one party that wants to be in charge of the federal government so they can expand it, and one party that wants to be in charge of the federal government so they can get it under control. It’s a terrible debate, it’s a debate fought entirely on our opponents’ terms. We must shift the eye line and the ambition of our conservative movement away from managing government and toward the mission of growth.”

Sealing his comments, Jindal insinuated Republicans needed to move away from the notion of  “if we can just put together a spreadsheet and a power point and a TV ad, all will be well.”

Jindal’s remarks were intended for RNC Chairman Priebus in hopes of winning him over to the idea of a Jindal 2016 White House Bid. Priebus has directed a five-member panel known as the “Growth and Opportunity Project” to identify winning political strategies for the future, particularly in the area of minority outreach.

Translated – we must change to accommodate and appease the lesser, weaker groups of people in our country. If it’s not white, not straight, not Christian or doesn’t have a penis, it’s a MINORITY and we must snivel and sells our soles to political satan in order to win their votes just like our hero Obama does. Crude translation, but every word of it is truth, so it stays.

We must also stop nagging the “cool ones” about things like the debt ceiling and spending. We gotta loosen up! Go with the political flow here people!

This douche, and Chris Christie, and Mr. big britches Collin Powell – should all three effectively removed from the Republican party.They’re perpetuating it’s demise.